Counting Down My Top 15 Baseball Movies

There are few things I love in this world. One of them is baseball. Another is movies. Put them together and I can't get enough. I have seem so many shitty movies in my life because baseball was involved is it.

Fuck, I watched Trouble With The Curve. What an abortion against film.

I've seen Calvin Marshall. No one has seen that piece of shit.

Anyway, onto my personal favourite top 15 list.

Aside: I really wanted to include Beer League, as it is fucking hilarious, but felt it didn't fit the strict criteria of being a baseball movie, because softball isn't baseball.

Also, I don't count women's baseball as real baseball either, but that movie was terrible, so it had no merit for inclusion.

#15: The Natural

I never even really liked this movie. It was slow, a little boring, and had a predicable ending. This movie gets such a blow job from critics and fans a like, which makes me dislike it even more. The only reason for it's inclusion on my list is so assholes don't think I forgot about it. I didn't forget. I saw it. It was not great. Grow up and like movies because they are good, not because you are supposed to like them.

#14: Mr. 3000

This movie is wicked. I used to create "T-Rex Pennebaker" in video games out of my love for this movie. It was Bernie Mac in maybe the only watchable thing he's done besides his funeral. This movie would be higher, but it was more popcorn comedy than straight up baseball movie. Image how awesome this movie would've been with Denzel as the lead.

#13: The Sandlot

This is another movie that tends to be romanticized. Sure, it's pretty good. It's not great though. It has many good parts, but for the most part it just suffers from not being funny in a comedy. It also spawned sequels which were terrible. I'd rather get AIDS than have to watch another Sandlot sequel.

#12: Field Of Dreams

You know what? I don't care for this movie that much either. I don't even remember the last time I watched this movie. Kevin Costner was brilliant though, and the scene where he plays catch with his dad makes me happy. It is a good movie, and one that has been held in high regard by most, but I was never able to embrace the movie. Maybe another viewing will change that.

#11: Bad News Bears

That's right. The Billy Bob Thornton one. I'll pause while haters hate. Done? Good. The original, while good, suffers from age. Sure, the Coach is supposed to be a prick, but when Matthiau says "nigger" I cringe. I saw that movie before I was 10. No wonder I'm a racist. At least Billy Bob keeps the racism to a minimum, while dominating the screen with his trashy, beer drinking character that he plays so well (most likely because his parents are close relatives and he lived the character).

#10: Touching Home

Starting off the top 10 with an obscure true story, which is a drama wrapped in baseball. Ed Harris plays a drunk father of twin boys trying to deal with the fact they may never make it in pro baseball. It is an excellent movie with a mostly unknown cast. Evan Jones (from 8 Mile & Mr. 3000) is excellent as usual in his minor part.

#9: The Final Season

The Final Season is a true story about a high school in Iowa with a power house baseball program, whose school is merging with a local town. Thus, they get to play, you guessed it, one final season. Sean Astin is perfect in the role of Kent Stock, an in over his head coach. The kids in the movie are what makes it. Michael Angarano (Black Irish & Red State) is his usual excellent self. Brett Claywell (Tim from One Tree Hill) is wonderful. Despite mostly negative reception, this in one I'd recommend.

#8: Little Big League

This was my dream. It still kind of is. When Randy Johnson awkwardly walks out of the bullpen to face Lou Collins, I get chills. When Ken Griffey awesomely announces he will steal 2nd, 3rd, then home I get weepy. When Billy Heywood takes the fearsome hairy closer out of the game, I feel like I'm right there. Fuck it, I'm gonna watch this movie right now.

#7: Eight Men Out

The fantastic movie about the 1919 Black Sox scandal starred John Cusack (Runaway Jury), Charlie Sheen (Men At Work), David Strathairn (Steel Toes), and many others. The baseball was well done, the court room stuff was great, and the stuff in between keeps you guessing even though you know the end result.

#6: The Rookie

Anybody who knows me knows I used to work where videos were rented and dreams were crushed. I used to play this movie on a loop if I could convince my co-workers to allow it. I love this movie. I always envisioned myself as a 40 year old man taking a vacation form work to try out for the Blue Jays. I would show up, get laughed at, then start chucking 95mph heat out of my left arm. Fuck, that would be amazing. There is so much to like about this movie that is makes you look past some historical inaccuracies, most notably the Alex Rodriguez issue. Dennis Quaid was straight up gangster as Jim Morris and the kids that play on his high school team are excellent. Jay Hernandez (Hostel), Rick Gonzalez (Coach Carter, Old School), Chad Lindberg (Adam and Eve), and Angelo Spizzirri are excellent.

#5: Major League

This is where it gets difficult. The top 5. Leading it off is Major League. There were 3 of these amazing movies and I love all 3. My affection for Gus Cantrell, the manager of the Buzz in "Back To The Minors," is well documented. I pick the original to highlight because it has iconic lines. From Rick Vaughn saying he looks like a banker while rocking a cut off leather vest with his tie to Jake Taylor telling Roger Dorn that he's going cut his nuts off and stuff them down his fucking throat, there are amazingly quotable lines. All 3 movies have something special. The amazing switch to Omar Epps (my favourite black actor) from Wesley Snipes (Joe Rogan would totally kick his ass) in Major League 2 is what dreams are made of. The Juan Lopez twins and Hog Ellis in part 3. Rube Baker, Pedro Cerrano, Taka Tanaka. Jack Parkman's shimmy. I could go on for hours.

#4: Moneyball

This movie was very good. The book, while this sounds pretentious, was even better. The movie had some things it neglected to mention. The killer 3 of Barry Zito, Tim Hudson, and Mark Mulder got so little time on screen that you would assume they were mediocre pitchers, when Zito was the Cy Young winner that season. Miguel Tejada got very little mention, even though he was MVP that season. The movie had lies. Carlos Pena was not traded for nothing, he brought back Ted Lilly in a trade that also included Jeff Weaver. Chad Bradford and Jeremy Giambi were already members of the team before that season, not picked up off the scrap heap as implied. Still, a great movie with terrific performances. Chris Pratt (the amazingly versatile) shined as Scott Hatteberg. Brad Pitt was excellent as Billy Beane. Jonah Hill was charming as his fat self playing Peter Brand (Paul DePodesto in the real world). The inaccuracies do not detract from the movie. It is well told and leaves you waiting for what's next.

#3: 61*

The big dicked Thomas Jane stars as Mickey Mantle and Barry Pepper stars as Roger Maris in this fantastic HBO movie about Rogers Maris' chase for the home run record in 1961. It chronicles the Yankee culture of being a "true Yankee" and follows Roger Maris as he deals with life away the Midwest and directly in the spotlight. The movie showcases Mantle's historic levels of alcoholism and his super human ability to play through pain. This movie is the perfect kind baseball movie, taking an historic season and adding in humanity. It doesn't hurt that they have two fantastic actors playing the leads. Watch this movie if you haven't.

#2: Bull Durham

Oh, Bull Durham. The story of Nuke LaLoosh and Crash Davis pushing through the Durham Bulls in opposite directions in their careers. Nuke is the young fireballer who the organization has big plans for. Crash is the veteran minor leaguer who is brought in to mentor the young pitcher. Throw in some fuck scenes with Susan Surandon (with both dudes, but not together) and you get an interesting mix of awesome. What makes this number 2 is the Crash Davis character. Kevin Costner knows how to play a baseball player. Crash is witty, crude, sweet, and downright charming thanks to Costner. The bar fight scene is brilliant, probably the best scene in the movie. This movie also let's you inside the game a little, with the back and forth between Nuke and Crash (the scene where Crash tells the batter what's coming is very funny).

#1: For Love Of The Game

And finally, number one with a bullet. Or should I say number one with a Billy Chapel fastball painting the outside corner. This movie is perfect, no pun intended. Vin Scully doing the broadcasting. The moments where Chapel has to power through pain, both emotionally and physically. The whole thing is very well done. The premise is simple. A veteran Major League pitcher (a very good one) is pitching his last game and he has a perfect game going. Throughout the movie, there are flashbacks that lead you through his life on the field and off. The moments where he dissects how he is going to attack the hitters is interesting and well crafted. His relationship with his friend and catch Gun Sinski (a serious John C. Reilly) is adorable. An all around wonderful movie that makes me love baseball every time I watch it. It's how I used to picture Roy Halladay's career ending.