What A Fucked Up Night

So I had a really weird dream last night. I was chillin at work, just checking out the Jays website for the 10th time, when the phone rings.

It was Ted Rogers. He asked for me, and then invited me to lunch. To Dennys.

He offered me the GM position of the Blue Jays for 2009 and beyond. I came, then I accepted.

What followed was a flurry of movements that would make a video game transaction screen seem small.

I released half the minor leagues, signing MLB cast-offs to minor league deals. Matt Lawton, Robert Fick, Todd Walker, Marcus Giles, Alex Gonzalez, Preston Wilson, BY Kim, John Patterson, and a slew of other crap.

Trades were made like a bat out of hell.
Scott Rolen to San Diego for PTBNL.
Lyle Overbay to Texas for Brandon McCarthy.
BJ Ryan and Justin Jackson to Arizona for Mark Reynolds.

Signings were made to shore up the bench and add depth to the system. Adam Dunn was my crown jewell, but Ben Broussard? Pablo Ozuna? Alex Cintron? Morgan Ensberg? Johnny Estrada? Rob Mackowiak? Jason Jennings? Chris Reitsma? Mark Teahan? Was I high? Or a fucking genius?

The 2009 team would look something like this.

C: Rod Barajas
1B: Adam Lind
2B: Joe Inglett
3B: Mark Reynolds
SS: Aaron Hill
LF: Travis Snider
CF: Vernon Wells
RF: Alex Rios
DH: Adam Dunn

C: Johnny Estrada
CIF/OF: Mark Teahan
SS: John MacDonald
INF: Marco Scutaro

The line-up would be my perfect blend of lefties/righties:

1. Inglett
2. Rios
3. Lind
4. Wells
5. Dunn
6. Reynolds
7. Snider
8. Hill
9. Barajas

Pretty fucking scary.

The pitching staff, I loved it: Roy Halladay, Shaun Marcum, Dustin McGowan, Jesse Litsch, Brandon McCarthy

The Bullpen. Closing out games, Brandon League & Scotty Downs. Jesse Carlson, Casey Janssen, Jeremy Accardo, Jason Jennings, and David Purcey.

I awoke shaking, sweating, with a boner. It obviously wasn't real, because who the fuck would take Rolen off the Jays' hands.

Then I remembered that it was the beginning of the most important stretch of games in the last decade, and smiles were abound.

Go Jays Go.